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  • Writer's pictureKristen

Mountains and Valleys and Future Days

Updated: Jul 30, 2019

Clearly, Matt is the one in our relationship who loves music the most. He is the one who finds the new artists to listen to and the one who introduces our kids to the essentials. He is the creator of our playlists, the procurer of all of our concert tickets and can often be heard serenading us in the car, the kitchen or the backyard. He is the reason our house is full of music.

Although Matt has mastered the art of finding the perfect song for every occasion, I have not. However, there are two songs that have been stuck in my head this past week. As I've been reflecting on this next stage in our Glioblastoma journey, I thought that sharing them might be a good way to frame the good news we got at Matt's last appointment.

Earlier this month, we learned that his latest MRI was another clear one, showing no tumour regrowth. We were both feeling pretty confident about getting good results, but it was still a great feeling to get this news, as it means that Matt gets to take a break from treatment. He doesn't have any appointments, chemo, radiation or even blood tests until his next MRI in July. This is indeed excellent news, but not the end of this journey.

In March, we saw Stephen Fearing play at Heartwood Hall, and he sang a song called Long Walk to Freedom about Nelson Mandela. For the record, I am not saying that Matt has faced the same challenges as Nelson Mandela, but as we listened to the song, there were so many lyrics that seemed to apply to Matt. The song begins:

I have walked a long way to freedom Tried not to stumble and fall down in the road I’ve discovered that the secret of climbing these great hills Is there’s always one more hill to go I have taken the time to stop and rest a while Looking back on the valley below I dare not linger, for my long walk isn’t over So many miles still to go

This week, the song and its imagery are my best attempt so far at figuring out how to celebrate and enjoy Matt's continued good health. The long walk continues, but it sure feels great to hang out in this valley for a bit!

A few months ago, Matt played a Pearl Jam song for me in the car on the way to London called Future Days. I had never heard it before, but I loved it immediately (despite the lump in my throat), and listened to it on repeat in the days that followed. I kind of forgot about it until it came to mind again this week, and it's the other song that's been cautiously creeping into my earphones and my heart.

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